i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
