yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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