I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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