Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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