his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
