3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
