i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
