i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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