I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
