it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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