All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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