i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize