Christians are straight up FREAKS
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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