Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
