if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Michael Bay diarrhea
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
