she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
