I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
