Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
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I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
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A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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