My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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