You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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