He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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