the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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