Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize