ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
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So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
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I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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