Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize