before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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