I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
