wake up i wanna do it froggy style
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize