just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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