I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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