I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize