shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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