Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
