You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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