ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
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Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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