Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
