Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
