just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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