Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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