i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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