Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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