WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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