You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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