my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize