so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
