I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
