i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Its about making memories worth repressing
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize