I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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