I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
