I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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